I didn't start watching NCIS because of Mark Harmon, but the fact that he had a lead role convinced me to give it a try.
Then I fell in love with Tony, Abby, Kate, Ducky, and even McGee.
I love everythign about Kate, I'd share Abby's coffin anytime. I want to do all sorts of things to McGee, just to see him blush, and Tony is one of the most attractive men I have ever seen.
Gibbs?
Just one of many.

Or so you'd think.
Because I find myself rewatching NCIS episodes not for the Gibbs/Tony interaction, not for the story, the jokes, the wonderful acting, but because of Mark Harmon.
I see him smile and I can't help but smile myself.

That's not what is worrying me though.
I first saw Mark Harmon on The West Wing. So, after I my little epiphany, I decided to rewatch the few WW episodes he appears in. Especially the scene on the shooting range.
And there is was.
Thirty years of feminism blown to hell.
This blatant show of male masochism and violence, the obvious "I'm a man and I will protect you, the women." The whole thing is so made to be turn-on, to show how male and sexy and strong Agent Donovan is, they didn't even try to hide it, because it is so obvious.
And what do I do?

Right, I get totally turned on.
Here I am, a self-confident, independent woman, and yet, put a gun in the hand of an attractive man and give him the role of the protector, and can hardly keep myself from dropping down to my knees to worship him.

That scene is one of the sexiest scenes on TV ever.

Yes, I can admit that to myself and to the rest of the world, but I still feel a little ashamed for feeling that way.

But it is so damn sexy.
So sexy.




(screencap from oxoniensis's site)

Anyway, this has got me thinking.
Daniel doesn't turn me on when he uses his P-90.
Jack does.

Okay, with Jack I could tell myself that it's RDA, which excuses everything. But I find Mark Harmon, not in general, but in the two roles I've seen him in a lot sexier than Jack. No, let me rephrase that: I find it impossible not to find him exy despite my best attempts not to do so.

Because he carries off his AlphaMaleness in a very different way.
With RDA, there's always the little element of making fun of himself. He doesn't take himself seriously. His best moments are the ones where he is being funny, and then you can see how he decides that the joke is over and he gets back to business. That's when I get weak knees.

Gibbs just is alpha. As if he doesn't know how to be different, as if insecurity is a foreign word to him. And I fall for it. I don't want to, I tell myself that it is ridiculous to fall for that kind of thing, that as a strong and independent woman I really don't need a man who'd not let me have my way, who'd not let me want to have my way. But he doesn't care.
If you'd laugh about Jack's Alphamaleness, he'd look at you a bit offended, and then he'd try a different approach. Not that he'd admit it.

Gibbs? He wouldn't care.
It's driving me crazy. And the whole gun thing is worrying me even more, but at least with that I'm sure that I'd escape if it happened in real life, since I'm generally suspicious of people who carry guns.
But the whole Macho/Alpha/Men-in-charge thing?

Not so sure if I could escape from that one in real life.

To think that this is what I do with the freedom that feminism has fought for all this years...
My mom would be ashamed of me.

*goes off to watch the shooting scene again*

P.S.: Amazon.co.uk has West Wing DVDs on sale.
I figure I'm going to have to buy my own christmas presents anyway, so I might just as well buy myself something nice.
*orders*